July 14, 2008
Book Dream

 I wish I could recall the entire dream, but all I remember is seeing a book set against pitch black.  On the cover was a picture of Patrick's face that kept zooming in and out, sort of like a hologram. The book was surrounded by little sparks of fluorescent green light whenever the pages were turned.

July 22, 2008
Hang in There!

I think I received a sign today. At the Tuesday Morning Inc. store, the moment I walked through the door my gaze fell on a book that was in the wrong place.  It had a cartoon character on it, holding on to a rope from a cliff side.  The title above read "Hang in There." Also, at the register, the lady working there was playing her own music apart from the music that was playing over the loud speakers throughout the store.  She was listening to the classical music from the Disney cartoon Beauty and the Beast.  Immediately, I received the feeling that it was a message for me... hopefully from Patrick. The "Hang in There" book was about me not giving up on finding a literary agent for my book(s), and the music from Beauty and the Beast was confirmation.  I say this because my family calls me "Belle" a lot of the time and because I think I've received a sign from Patrick before, pertaining to Beauty and the Beast.  Also, in the book that I wrote, the main character's nickname by one person is "Belle."

I just remembered something else.  For at least a week now, I've been asking Patrick to send me a sign that he really is trying to help me land an agent.  I guess this was it?

The cartoon character on the book reminded me of 'Ziggy' (from the comic strips) and my grandpa's favorite expression was "Hang in There."  But... my grandpa had nothing much to do with any of his grandkids when he was alive.  I can't imagine that changing.  Not to mention that I'm not a fan of his. Hopefully, it was a sign from either Patrick or even my grandmother.  My gut says that IF it meant anything, it was from Patrick.  Grandma most likely would come to me in a dream to say Hi.  She did that a month or two ago.

Golden Sparks -  OT

This is off topic, but the night after the kids went back home to Austin I just slept in their room again instead of my own.  In the middle of the night I woke up - still groggy of course - and saw these little flashing sparks of gold light.  They twinkled and had these tiny little rays of light extending from them.  They just sort of slowly floated and blinked.  They were very bright.  A bright golden color.  I mean Gold-Gold, too.  They were very glittery. I just don't know if it was part of a dream, or if I saw it because I was half awake/asleep at the time. 

To me they were floating in the hallway sort of near my bedroom door, but in reality the bed is situated far enough from the door that you can't see that much into the hallway.  You can't see my door at all from the bed, either.  I don't know what it was.  I can't imagine it being from any car light beams coming through the big window upstairs either b/c this looked nothing like that in the slightest.  I guess these were spirit lights?

Old Dream from years ago

Okay, I have proof that I have been an idiot....

Years ago I had this dream which, after I had it, just jotted it down and didn't really think overmuch about it. That dream I'll copy and paste from my first Patrick website:

(Which I've now transferred, by the way.  The link is on this site's Homepage)


I was sitting with my sister, next to an indoor pond.  Small plants were everywhere.  My sister showed me a facial expression Patrick used to have.  (I don't think I really saw it, even in the dream.  I just think it was some sort of serious look.  Nothing noteworthy, really). Then I looked down and saw that one of the little plants beside us had PLAID on it.  It was as if a light with a plaid pattern was shining on it.  I immediately knew that it meant that Patrick was actually Scottish, and not Irish as one would naturally presume; given his name.  My sister looked at the plant and told me that it meant he was in mourning.

Okay, so I have no idea what that was about but I refuse to be close-minded about anything that comes through about him.  Maybe it will make sense to me someday.


Well, years later... on August 13, 2008 to be exact... it makes sense.  Lol! I remember that at the time I had this dream, I half brushed it off because I just thought the plaid/plant ordeal just plain silly and not symbolic.  Tonight of course, I can see my error in thinking.

Perhaps Patrick was trying to tell me that he was mourning over Scotland.  He must have fought for Scotland's freedom; Culloden or something similar?  I really feel stupid now.  It's so obvious what this dream meant.

And if there are further symbols going on here, I would definitely say the pond = emotions.  (In my thinking, water in a dream always echoes emotions).

I probably should also mention something I didn't when I wrote down this dream.  The setting GREATLY looked like the Commons Area of my college.  It was one of the San Jacinto Junior Colleges, and now I'm thinking that that right there might have been noteworthy.  WHY, you ask?  Ever hear of the Battle of San Jacinto?


Coincidence?  Likely not.

If I had paid closer attention to this dream when I had it, it's meaning would have been crystal clear very quickly.  I actually feel sort of lousy and lazy and rude for not paying much heed to it.  It can't be all that easy for spirits to enter our dreams, and here I just recorded it and moved on.

So, Patrick... I'm sorry and will pay more attention from now on.  I thought I had learned this lesson a while back, but apparently not.  Oftentimes the "silliness" in a dream really is THE ACTUAL MESSAGE.  I have got to condition myself not to brush off my dreams so easily.

Another lightbulb moment

I realized something else.  In the past, especially when I had zero faith that he and I could ever communicate well on our own, I always said it’d be so much easier to find answers if only my sister would listen to him.  (My sister has mediumistic abilities, no question.  She just chooses not to use them because it’s too much to handle when coupled with family and career). 

Anyway, I realized this morning that Patrick must know about this b/c I’ve had at least three dreams where MY SISTER is telling me things that Patrick said.  I think it’s way of  ‘granting my wish’ so-to-speak in my sister helping us communicate.

It also reminds me of how I’ve always said I wished I had a beautiful, really well done Spirit Drawing of him.  Not long after I voiced this, someone posted their Spirit Art to a forum I used to frequent.  Every month or so they’d do a spirit drawing and then ask us to post our thoughts on what it might be trying to tell us.

Okay, instead of babbling about that Spirit Art here, I’ll just post the link to it from my first Patrick site.  Just scroll down to the “Knight Angel For Truth” post.


I say that I wish my sister would help us communicate… so Patrick makes due with having her appear in my dreams a few times as a medium.

I say I wish I had a Spirit Drawing of him… so Patrick makes due with that drawing someone did on that forum a while back.  (That drawing wasn’t of him, by the way, but I think he saw the feather hat as the closest he was going to get.  Lol!  I say this b/c Nat and I were always laughing about a silly feather cap she said he wore a lot).

8 - 16 - 08
"What's up, Doc?"

As this post will no doubt prove, there isn't much of anything Patrick-related going on.  But, I made a promise to myself a long time ago to post every little thing that comes through that might be related to him... hence this entry. 

When going to bed last night I had an image of a funky looking rabbit in my head.  Since Patrick has mentioned my love of rabbits from that past life to 2 or 3 people, and since I've dreamt about one over the past year, I figure there's a possibility this is related to that past life.  If so, I had one shaggy, crazy looking rabbit.  Lol!  It was a medium brown color with a creamy (not quite white, but almost) underside.  It's ears hung down low and at an angle, and were really shaggy.  This rabbit was very "scraggly" looking.  I don't know much about rabbits, even though I did have one as a pet for a long time.  It ran loose in our backyard like a dog, and lived quite happily beneath our deck.  Thumper didn't have much to do with us though. 

Anyway, this morning the word "Angora" kept popping into my head.  I figured there must be a breed of rabbit with that name, but wasn't sure.  I finally just googled "Scotland... Rabbit" and lo and behold I see pics of that scraggly little beast whose breed really is called "Angora."

I think this is grasping at straws, but on Wikipedia it mentioned this breed originating in Turkey.  That stuck out to me b/c YEARS AGO my mother mentioned something about how she felt like Patrick might have been to Turkey sometime in that past life.  Maybe stumbling into that was a message?  If so, perhaps Patrick brought me back one from there since I had so many other rabbits and were so fond of them... and especially since that breed didn't really exist anywhere else at that time.

Some of them are pretty funky looking.  I wonder if I even recognized what the heck it was?  Lol!  The one I saw in my mind's eyes was much scragglier than the ones in these pics.


I think I heard...

... Patrick's voice a moment ago.   I was getting last-minute things ready for Hurricane Ike when I heard a man's voice say my name.  It was very clear.  I guess it's his way of saying he's looking out for us.  Of course, I can't prove that it was him but I have no idea who else it could be.  I DEFINITELY heard a man saying my name though.  No question about that. 


Wake Up

We lost electricity from the hurricane for 14 days.  (NOT fun, by the way).  One of those evenings I did have a possible Patrick dream.  In it I saw my nephew, Luke, only he was a little younger than he is now.  I haven't seen the kids for a while now, and in my dream I was about to leave when I told him I loved him.  My nephew said to me that people are always telling him that, and that he wishes people would come up with a new way to express those words.  Lol!  When I asked what other words he was looking for, he said "Wake Up."  (Just like Patrick said in that loud evp that I have of him).

Weird dream, I know, but I've learned to pay attention even to the silly ones.  Maybe it's his way of explaining to me what he meant by that evp.  To "Wake Up" and remember that we love each other perhaps?

I also keep thinking I had a dream about him a few days back, only I can't recall any of it.


Think of me Fondly

This might mean nothing, but all day long yesterday I had the song "Think of Me" from The Phantom of the Opera playing inside my head.  I mean that song and nothing else.

I bring it up here b/c of Patrick having referred to me as "My Christine" a few times before.  It's mentioned a few times on my first site here, towards the bottom of the page. 

Also, those lyrics always have resonated with me.  I've even had several dreams where Patrick tells me to "Remember" or "Don't Forget me in my time."  I've even had that dream where my sister said he told her that he and I "never want to forget each other."

"Think of Me" Lyrics



This post will no doubt prove that I should rename this site, "In Dreams He Doesn't Come."

Patrick experiences are at a low right now, so I'm posting a tiny coincidence that might be nothing at all.  But here I sit at the computer after midnight, not really wanting to go to sleep yet... so here I am.  Anyway, here's that coincidence. 

In the car yesterday, on the way to the post office to mail a partial of my manuscript that another agent requested, my mother mentioned something about this agent's name.  His name is "Andrew King," and she said she thought that a little funny b/c it makes her think of Patrick; the "King" part of his name.  (And my mother and I hardly ever discuss Patrick).

Then fast forward to this morning, where my mother shouts from downstairs that "Anna and the King" just came on the tv.  (That was one of my obsession movies when it first came out.  I watched it twice a day if I could). 

Also, I do have an evp or two of Patrick saying he was a "King."  (And hold the horses right there, naysayers. I'm not saying that I know that's true, but come on... not all kings were powerful and famous in the worldly sense.  The man might very well have been a powerful king in his own neck of the woods, but it's not like he was King Arthur.  Lol!  I do KNOW that he was royalty, however).

And if it's true that Patrick and I couldn't be together - even for a while - due to his station, the theme song to "Anna and the King" certainly echoes that.  My gut tells me that is true, by the way.  It's been a very common theme in my dreams and with my obsession movies.

"How Can I Not Love You" Lyrics

Recurring Dream

I don't know why I never mentioned this before, but over the years I have had this other recurring dream.  I'm standing on this balcony of a huge castle.  I'm surrounded by LOTS of people.  Tons of people, shoulder-to-shoulder.  It's pitch black out... and when I say that, I mean it is VERY DARK.  So dark that you can't even see the people's faces when up close. It's really noisy with people talking, and we're all watching fireworks. 

I also remember feeling in this dream that I should be having as much fun as the people celebrating around me.  Instead, I was pretending to enjoy myself, at least a little bit.  I felt very... unfulfilled, I guess.  Alone.


One More Song...

I completely forgot to mention this the other day with that one entry.  We all have our obsession movies, which over time give us a glimpse about a secret we've kept from ourselves.  For me, it's movies where the lovers just cannot be together.  Movies such as the ones below:

The Ghost and Mrs. Muir
The Phantom of the Opera

Out of Africa

Somewhere in Time
Moulin Rouge!
Anna and the King
Legends of the Fall
PS I Love You

The Thorn Birds

First Knight

(Richard Harris on Broadway)
Romeo and Juliet (the older version)

Okay, so you get the picture.  Well, as a child I had an obsession song.  I used to beg my father all the time to sing Willie Nelson's "Blue Eyes Crying in the Rain."  Even though it made me cry, every time I'd ask him to sing it again.  I'll post the lyrics below.  Who knows?  Maybe there's a deeper meaning for why I was so drawn to that song, even as a little girl.  Is it Patrick-related?  Time will answer that, but my instincts tell me Yes.

In the twilight glow I see her
Blue eyes crying in the rain
When we kissed goodbye and parted
I knew we'd never meet again
Love is like a dying ember
And only memories remain
And through the ages I'll remember
Blue eyes crying in the rain
Someday when we meet up yonder
We'll stroll hand in hand again
In the land that knows no parting
Blue eyes crying in the rain

Either I need some sleep (haven't slept well since before our Disney trip) and am overanalyzing, or what I'm about to share is confirmation from Patrick.  I'm always running into those soulmate numbers - 2 and 1 - and I just noticed that this YouTube video is exactly 2:21 seconds in length.  And I have to write that little fact down on here since I do believe most signs are subtle.  They aren't all fireworks and grandeur.  The truth is in the little details, I believe.  Having said that, IF those numbers are confirmation about that song meaning something, I think he's going to have to do better than that.  Lol!  (Sorry, but it's true).


A dream - can ya believe it?

Night before last, it took a while for me to fall asleep b/c of the voices I'd hear in my room off and on.  (Some woman commenting to someone I was trying to sleep, then random words I couldn't hear well).  I hear them in my room a lot these days, always at night, and usually it's a woman.  They're harmless though, so it really doesn't bother me.  Over the past months, I've slowly been talking myself into trying to develop my clairaudience.  I've always been afraid that once it's on, I won't be able to turn it off. 

So since I'm least afraid of Patrick, last night I told him that if he ever talks to me he's going to have to speak louder so I can hear him.  I then told him that as I fall asleep, I'll try to listen for his voice.  If I hear him, then great.  (I've heard him a few times before anyway).  If not, that's okay too.  It'll take some practice, especially on my part.  I also told him that I sure hope he's helping me find an agent, b/c while I'm trying to think positively..... it's almost impossible to keep that up since I've run out of agencies to query.

Then this morning I had a dream.  I'm still not sure it was a dream visit, but I think it's possible since I haven't dreamt about him for eons and because before I went to sleep last night, I told him I'd wish he'd come into my dreams again.  (I've asked him this before - a couple weeks ago - and nothing happened). 

So this morning I dreamed that I was walking down the gallery upstairs, headed towards the bathroom.  Once in the hall, I noticed that the computer was on in the guestroom.  I could hear Patrick's voice constantly saying - "Becky... Becky... Becky... Becky."  In the dream I didn't enter the bedroom b/c it was the middle of the night, was dark, I was the only one upstairs, and I just didn't have the guts to go in there alone I guess.  I'm not exactly sure of the reason, however, b/c I immediately woke up from my dream then.  And why?  Because I had to go to the bathroom.  Lol!

So you can see why I'm skeptical, right?

Or maybe that was the point.  He knew I was about to get up, and was telling me he was in the guestroom just then?  Did he think it'd freak me out more knowing that he'd hang out in my bedroom? Lol!

Or maybe the computer being on - and him being in that room - was the whole point?  I just now thought of this, but that is the room and the computer where I write.  Maybe that dream was just his way of saying he is trying to help me land an agent.  Hmm....

I don't know.
  At least it's something to ponder.  My instincts tell me that this might have been a dream where Patrick really is trying to tell me something.  I guess I'll know soon enough.

Que Sera, Sera.
Whatever will be, will be.

Another reason why I think that really was a dream formulated by him, is because when I do hear his voice (which is rare, but has happened when awake), he's either just saying "Kristin" a couple times, or "Becky."  I never hear any other message, but one of those names (usually Becky) being repeated.  I wonder why that is?

Update: Another possibility for that dream could be his way of telling me to start writing again.  But..... I really don't feel that's it.  It's another guess at least.


Fondant -

I've really thought about not typing up this dream that I had this morning, but I think I had better. It's been on my mind all day.

I've always wanted to come up with a home-based business that will make me happy, and which I'd be comfortable with.  Even if it was a little side business in the beginning, I think that'd be great.

For years I've always wanted to learn how to make those fancy Fondant cakes.  (I'll post a couple pics below of the fancier, VERY artistic kind).
  I don't have a sweet tooth and have never tasted a cake like this, but I've always seen them as works of art.  The first time I saw them was when I had a subscription to Victoria magazine.  I mean, I LOVE these cakes b/c with the right artist they can be so very beautiful.  I've even seen a show about these on WE tv this year.  People make them for weddings and showers.


A couple weeks ago I was looking at home-based business ideas.  The only one I've always thought I might be able to do is pet photography, but I'm not at all comfortable with the thought of always having to drive to a stranger's home and then work there.  (I like to work in my own space, and have a crippling fear of entering the homes of people I don't know). In addition to that, I have no sense of direction (as in finding their house. Lol!), absolutely hate driving, and suffer from social anxiety from time to time.  Those three things alone tell me Pet Photography won't work out.  So after looking up all these home business ideas, all of which I thought were boring and with no future, I just went on with my day.  I even forgot all about looking up that stuff.

Fast forward to early this morning.

I woke with the memory of a dream.  At first I just thought it was another silly dream, but then I recalled something in it which is definitely a symbol I relate to Patrick.

You got it, those darn rabbits again.  Lol!

In my dream I was at my aunt's place.  My aunt.......... (a VERY hard working single mom with about a gazillion jobs and whom this year started her own business, which will likely make the deserving woman a millionaire in a few years time)......... was living in this fancy hotel.  She and my mother were about to leave to go to this place called "Fondant Mansion."

Yep, I said it.  "Fondant Mansion."  Even in my dream I thought, 'What a stupid name.  Isn't that a type of cake that's so pretty?' Lol!  It was some kind of antique store or gift shop.

Next thing I know, I tell them I'll at least go downstairs to the car with them because I had forgotten my makeup in there.  But by the time we reached downstairs, I realized I hadn't been paying attention to where my aunt's room was compared to the lobby.  With my sense of direction, never in a million years would I find my way back to it alone.  So I tell them I'll just tag along with them to this shop they're going to visit.

Also--- when we entered the lobby of this hotel, I noticed that all the elevators had wood carvings of rabbits above them.

After that, I'm inside that shop.  I'm in the back, by myself, looking at these little miniature glass figurines. They were of animals, I think.  This is when I woke up, but I think - not sure - that some of the animals made of glass were a turtle or a snail?  I'm unsure of what the others were on the shelf, but there were a lot.

Here's my interpretation:

Elevators = Going up... elevation... reaching new heights

Fondant MANSION = Money... financial success

My aunt = business woman

Fancy-schmancy hotel = financial success

= Patrick's 'calling card' if you will.  A message.

Glass miniature animals = breakable... small... handle with care
(Perhaps the way I see myself?  I'm TOO cautious?)

Turtle/Snail = S-l-o-w to progress
(Representative of my current job with no advancement)

What if this was Patrick's way of telling me to think about having my own cake business?  (NEVER in a MILLION years would I have thought of that on my own.  I mean NEVER).   What if it could be as successful as my aunt's new business she's just started?  I'm not talking about mega bucks here....... after all, they are just cakes.  Lol!... but maybe it'd be enough money for someone like me who has no family to support.  It could just be a little side business in addition to my other job and my writing.

Of course, I'd have to learn how to make the pretty things first.  Lol!  I know I could do it, but only if I enjoyed it.  Otherwise, there would be no point.

The two things in this dream that did seem really silly and out of place were some teenage girls in the background, upset that they weren't invited to come with us to the mansion/shop.  I've no idea what that meant.  Also, back at my aunt's apartment Jack Sparrow (from Pirates of the Caribbean) was on her tv, but I'm not sure it was Johnny Depp's JS.  It was some other actor that looked and acted A LOT like him.  Again, I have no clue what that could mean.  I did have a dream a few months ago - related to my writing I think - where POTC made an appearance, too.  My only guess with this dream is to pay attention to the SPARROW in Jack Sparrow. 

Sparrow = flight?  Spreading my wings? 

I don't know.

I do think this dream really was a message, however.  When I see those rabbits, I always pay attention.  If I really am on to something here, I wish Patrick would give me some confirmation.  I mean, NEVER in a gazillion years would I have thought of this business idea.  Even now, typing this all up, I'm very skeptical.  I've always just seen learning how to bake those as just being something fun to learn as a hobby for myself and for family.  Hell, I never bake or cook anything really.  These cakes - of which I've never tasted even one of - are the only type of food/dessert I've ever actually looked forward to learning.

Anyway, the elevators with the rabbits are the big symbols here I think.  I think Patrick is telling me that this cake business idea (if I have that idea right) has possibilities. 

Again, rabbits (message from Patrick), elevators, etc. 
From his thoughts to my dream.  <grin>

Thanks, Patrick.  I'll give it a try, but I'm not holding my breath.  ;o)

This hobby I'll dive into for fun, and whatever happens (or not) happens.  I'll try not to burn down the kitchen.


Dream - television

I really don't know that this means anything. I can barely recall this dream. 

All I do remember, is that on a television I saw a scrolling text with a message from Patrick.  It read: "Kristin you said you would come back to me...."

(Yes, there's that familiar phrase appearing yet again; "Come Back To Me").

There was lots more on the screen, but I just cannot recall it. 

Bummer, huh?  If that was a message trying to come through from him, why won't he come as himself like I ask?  I guess men never listen, even after they're dead, huh?  Lol!

Okay, to be fair I think he did listen. I did ask that he come into my dreams last night, and to give me a positive message.  I guess this was it.  Maybe coming in person in dreamstate is just difficult for him.

I only wish I could recall the rest of the message.  (Sorry, Patrick.  My fault).

In the famous words of one Winnie-the-Pooh behind paws full of honey: Oh, Bother!

PS - I don't get the feeling that the "Come Back To Me" part of the message was the main idea he was trying to get across.  It's just that that was the only sentence I remember from the dream.  I wouldn't say he was 'pining away' for me.  Lol! He knows I have work to do here, and we'll be reunited again someday.


I think I appreciate this dream even more now.  I told my Mom about it tonight, and she was really touched by it.  I mean really touched.  Her first reaction was that it was sad.  She said "his heart is broken."  (Think you my Mom is a romantic? Lol!)  I really was surprised by her reaction.

And I'm beginning to think that M was right when she said that a lot of the truth about that past life with Patrick would come out in my manuscript that I wrote.  I strongly feel that the phrase "Come Back To Me" is connected not only to us being separated now, but it's something I told him in that past life.  In my book, those were the heroine's last words to him before he went off on his last battle.  I think that was... well, art imitating that life.


It's a virtue, they say?

I had a really bad night last night.  I was very upset over a rejection, feeling like I'll never find a literary agent that wants to represent me.  I'm been at this a long time now, and have run out of agencies to query.  I'm seriously beginning to feel like Patrick - no one for that matter - isn't helping me.  I feel all alone and abandoned here.

All anger and feeling sorry for myself aside..... all day I've researched agents, but at one point decided to click on someone's blog.  After that, I clicked on another blog in their side bar.  That's when I saw a picture that struck a chord.  I don't know if it's a sign, but after that "Hang in There" (possible) sign from a while back, I'm giving it a chance.

The picture is below, but first the backstory:

There's a meditation that I try sometimes before going to sleep.  (It's setting is on a stretch of beach.  You imagine your twin handing you a stick, and in the sand you write a desire/request for the Universe to send you).

In this meditation I always envision Patrick helping me find the right agent for our book.  Perhaps he's asking me - again - to be patient?  If so, does he have ANY idea how difficult that is for me?

Or maybe this meant nothing at all.  Maybe I just want it to be a message from him.  (I DO want that, but it is what it is.  It might mean something, and it might not.  I don't want to delude myself.  I want the FACTS). Why can't these things ever come across as being either black or white?  Why does it always have to be so difficult and raise more questions? 

One part of me believes it's a message, but then there's my other belief.  I've been at this agent hunting for a long time, and still I haven't succeeded. I'm trying to be positive, but harsh reality is beating me down... fast.

If this was a message from Patrick, telling me to be patient, then Thank You and I will try. If it means nothing at all, then "Where's the Dark Chocolate" is my response.

Time will most definitely reveal if this was a message or not.


Rabbits, a Candle & Crown

Something happened last night, which completely took me by surprise.  Late last night I decided to make Christmas siggys with paintings from Beatrix Potter’s “The Rabbit Christmas Party.”  I went into my room to get something, and while there noticed a candle flickering on my bookshelf.  It’s one of those miniature tea light candles that’s battery operated.  It’s set inside a little candle holder of a rabbit.

Last night I kept trying to find logical explanations for this, but I’ll not babble about all that.  Let’s just say I’ve thought of everything.

Nevertheless, in the end what we have here is a candle turning on by itself; a candle where you have to pick up the darn thing just to turn it on and off from underneath……… and then some rabbit coincidences.  I was making Beatrix Potter bunny siggies at the time, and the candle I found lit up was on a bunny candle holder.  Also, this candle holder sits in front of a crown. (There was another bunny coincidence, but I don't think it was anything).

So that’s bunnies and a crown.  Get the picture?  Lol!

I’m still flabbergasted and confused.  Patrick never does stuff like this.  You know, “ghostly” things like moving objects, etc.  And if it was anyone, it has to be him.  All that rabbit stuff and crown stuff can’t be coincidence, can it?  Also, candles don’t turn on by themselves.

Just thought of something else.  Now, this might be grasping at straws but at Hobby Lobby the other day I bought something for my room.  It’s a picture with a religious quote on it.  I’m much more spiritual than religious, but I fell in love with this thing at first sight and it was majorly on sale.  And well, this picture has a CROWN on it.


Yep, on December 10th it snowed!!!!!!  Can ya believe it?!  It wasn’t much, but it was a blast.  We haven’t had snow here since 2004.  Usually we have to wait at least 10 years between snowfalls.  

Since snow is such a miraculous, exciting event around here I decided to try evp.  These days I really don’t like trying for evp’s.  As a matter of fact, the last time I did evp was when putting up the Christmas tree last year…. (received an evp from Patrick – and my grandma and grandpa I think.  My grandpa I never knew, but Mom says it sounded like him)… and then when putting up the tree this year.  So since snow was an even more special event than putting up the Christmas tree, I decided to turn on that recorder and see what I get.  

There were voices on it but they were either hard to understand or not Patrick.  But… after I turned on that recorder I said out loud that I only want to hear evp’s from Patrick.  (Yeah, right.  Spirits don’t give a damn about requests).  When I was on my way out the door to that bedroom, I distinctly heard a male voice say  - “I’ll be here.”

That almost stopped me in my tracks, but I ignored it since it didn’t sound all that much like Patrick to me.  But then again, it was said very faintly.  Now, that I heard with my own ears, but on the tape I also heard a male voice say – “Always moving.  Like lightning.”  I don’t know who that was, but I imagine they were commenting on my running from the front yard to the back constantly, snapping pictures of the snow. 

I also received some evp’s on my digital camera that night.  (You’ll need good headphones to hear them). They were the last two videos I took, around midnight.  The voice was faint, but definitely male.  It said “Can’t see me… Becky.”  There was a little more on that clip, but I can’t make it out.   And I didn’t go looking for evp’s on the digital.  I was too concentrated on that lovely snow.


On another video I hear “Becky… Becky to me.”


But  I’m also VERY open that this WASN’T Patrick b/c in one spot I hear a different, younger voice saying a cuss word.  So, yeah… ya gotta be careful with evp.  There’s no way to prove whom the owner of any evp’s are.  Spirits are just people passed on, and some of them aren’t friendly or very mature.  That’s why I won’t be trying evp again until we put up the Christmas tree next year.  It really is more productive trying to communicate with spirits without contacting them through evp.  If you’re ghost hunting for fun, it has its place.  If it’s someone you know, however, it’s best to trust your intuition and pay heed to those dreams.  Get to know that spirit’s energy, too, b/c other spirits can disguise themselves.  (It’s happened to me before, but I always catch it). So I guess it really is a good thing that I overanalyze.  It’s healthy to be skeptical, but be openminded at the same time. 

Even with the candle lighting up, I’m skeptical.  It could have been anyone.  There’s no way to prove who did it.  And I’m skeptical anyway b/c I know there are some pretty immature spirits around here.  Tricksters.  I’ve never known them to do those “ghostly” things as mentioned above, but back when I used to do evp I received a lot of negativity.  Lots of curse words, and at least once a spirit pretending to be Patrick.  (He did this in a dream or two, too). It’s pretty easy to spot the tricksters though.  They give themselves away somehow, and as I said before – these days I have a feel for Patrick’s energy.  It’s taken me around 27 years to recognize it.  Lol!  Of course, for decades of those 27 years I never tried finding answers about whom Patrick is.  I just knew him as ‘that ghost.’  He was a very strange mystery, which I felt would never be solved.  I didn’t even try solving it back then.

Okay, so much for not babbling in this entry.  Lol!  I’d much rather be at Disney World right now, like my brother and SIL are.

Gerry/Snow Dream

This is off topic:

Two or three days before it SNOWED (Yipee!), I had a Gerry dream with SNOW present.  (Precognitive dream?  You bet!)   I was taking a trip with lots of people.  I was so incredibly excited to see all the snow.  I couldn’t wait to snap pictures of it, but everyone else was there to ice skate in the outdoor rink.  I got out of the car, camera in hand, when I spotted Gerry in the distance.  He was TALL and oh-my-God was he gorgeous.  In this dream I was mad for the guy.  I mean ‘Twitterpated’ beyond all hope. Lol!  So I see him in the crowd and he catches me trying to slip away unnoticed.  I never could ice skate and didn’t want to be forced to, so I wanted to slip off to take pictures of the snow instead.  But Gerry saw me, and when he did he gave me this look that told me “Like hell you’re getting away.  Nice try, but you’re not going anywhere.”  He literally dragged me away from walking in the opposite direction.

Next thing I know he and I are in some room, sitting on a bench against a wall.  We’re all alone and just talking.  The whole time he was talking I kept wishing the man would just shut up and give me a kiss.  Lol!  We were only friends, but I knew I had to keep my feelings for him secret.  I understood that he had to feel like HE was the one in control and making the first move. Anyway, he was wearing this strange necklace of a spider.  He took it off and said he’s probably not going to wear it anymore, as it was silly.  The whole time I couldn’t believe I kept a straight face b/c  I thought the necklace pretty ridiculous, too.

After that, some people come inside the room.  I was really disappointed because we were no longer alone, and not once did he make a move.  Lol!  He just talked every now and then, but for the most part was pretty quiet.